Hurricane Irene or Chemo?

I'd say they are similar.  Sure, one is wind and water and the other is a little bag of chemicals.  They both wreck havoc, pain, and leave a wake of destruction. 

As you've seen from the past few days, this round of chemo has been tough.  I'm hoping we are climbing out of the hole.  Roger was up and moving a bit today but generally felt poorly all day.  He said he had to lay down three times. Exhaustion and crappiness. I really hate hearing he felt so poorly that he had to lay down. In my mind (yes yes, my control-freak mind), I immediately jump to "what if something happened??". As you can imagine its difficult trying to balance living and working while still being around for your loved one.  Major balancing act.  Never mind the whole emotional element....just the sheer logistics are challenging and exhausting.   I had a busy day of work-related appointments including a client dinner so I was in and out of the house all day/evening.  By the time I returned home this evening, he seemed a tiny bit better.  More than I've seen in 5 days.  He ordered a pizza (yep, more health food) which was delivered shortly after I returned home this evening.  Unfortunately I think he's only eaten one piece....but its eating nonetheless. I don't think he's eaten enough in the last 72 hours to sustain a hummingbird, let along a grown male trying to recover from chemo. 

After feeling so poorly for so many days, Roger's disposition is naturally a little down.  No surprise.  Hell, can you blame him???  Not at all.  You still wish you had a magic wand to fix all the broken things, make all the wrongs right, and just generally make him feel better.  Despite all my wand waving....no magic. I think the "extra" bad days beyond what we predicted were discouraging for Roger AND for me. According to or chemo journal he really should be feeling much better.  I sure wish his body would cooperate with our chemo journal.  :-)

So, I'm officially pooped.  And, I gotta tell you...I miss my fun-loving hubby.  I know he's in there.  I see glimpses.  We laugh here and there and those moments of laughter increase as the chemo days fade into the background. 

Hoping you have loads of laughs in your world.  Hugs, angie and roger