The man in the picture

My darling hubby. You've seen him in many pictures over the past several weeks. The small, actually big difference with the guy in this photo verses the guy in the previous photos is that this guy now just has a tiny bit of peach fuzz for hair. His hair has started to fall out...and though he didn't have much...what little he had, he has had for years. He woke to find patches of hair on his pillow this morning and then found when he rubbed his head or pinch some of the hair...it came out. So, once I got home, we got the trimmers out and found this gorgeous shaped head hiding beneath Roger's hair. I've gotta tell you. This journey, as you all know, has not been the easiest. There have been terrifying moments, painful moments, difficult moments, exhausting moments, and inspired moments. You name it and we've probably felt it at some point. Tonight, cutting Roger's hair off may have to rank in the top 5 of difficult moments for me. He has laughed the whole thing off but I found that I just couldn't. The moment was too real for me. With each swipe of the cutters around his head, it felt like a swipe at my heart.

Now Roger will be the first to say there wasn't much hair that we cut off but nonetheless it was his hair. I know. I know. This is just supposed to be part of our new normal but, wow. I never thought it would be so tough for me. Roger said that if he had had more hair, the process would have bothered him more. So, I guess the silver lining is the fact that he is follically challenged.

:-).

Tomorrow marks the end of Week 4. Time has evaporated. We are on the calendar for chemo treatment on Monday 10/5 at 9:00 am. They will take blood and run labs to see what Roger's counts are first. If the doctor thinks that Roger is strong/healthy enough, then he will start phase 2 (hopefully the last phase) of chemo. He feels less crappy than yesterday but still feels crappy. Life is measured in degrees of crappiness right now (that's a technical term).

I'm not really sure what the weekend has in store for us. I think the weather promises to be very "fall like" with chilly temps and moist air...translation cold and wet. Obviously much depends on how Roger is feeling. Unfortunately we don't really know what his blood counts are. The doctors only test once a week. We'll try to balance being prudent and avoid potential infection with also trying to live life.

As always, one day at a time. I'm thankful for all of our friends and family. I know we've said this before in other posts, but its important that I continue to remind all of you how appreciative we are of your support. Roger also wants me to remind all of you, in his words "Everything will be ok. I'm ok." So straight from the horse's mouth to you.

More pictures here of Roger's glass creations. xxooxx, R&A