Started this post last night....and now the world is different

Friday nite's started post: The repetative theme - pain - remains a constant theme.  Another restless night netted broken sleep for us both. Roger once again woke with the need to vomit.  Very little comes out of his system.  Rather it just racks his poor body as he goes through the motions.  We think - THINK - the pain has reduced a tiny bit.  That's not to say its gone but merely if he doesn't move an inch when he's sitting there are no stabbing pains.  Shouldnt be a problem right?  Except he really really needs to move to prevent his muscles from completely vanishing.  Movement has been limited to one lap around the house and two trips up and down the stairs.  Otherwise, sofa or bed bound. 

Talked to the pain doctor's office.  We're changing the program.  Low and behold, after I mentioned to them (second time, mind you) that perhaps Roger is too skinny (understatement) for the pain patches to be effective.  You see the patch medication is absorbed through the body's fat and muscle.  Roger has neither.  So, he probably has been sporting these patches all over his body looking like a patchwork quilt with no benefit realized.  New plan will be to remove the patch and start taking a long-acting 8-12 hours between doses mega-painkiller.  This will be subsidized by other pain meds for "break through pain".  We will continue to do massages.

The above entry stopped. Roger had taken his ambien before anticipated. So I knew I had a short window to get him upstairs and pillowed into bed. I walked out of the room to put our upstairs stuff near the stairwell. I returned to find Roger trying to maneuver the one step up from the living room to the area near the stairs. Ambien kicked in and he lost his balance and fell. So. We stopped. Gathered our wits. Let his heart rate slow and then helped him up and then helped him upstairs.

Fast forward. I am posting from the Emergency Room. Roger fell again this afternoon. He wanted to sit outside to visit with a friend of ours. No problem. Despite my repeated requests for him to wait until he had help, he made his way outside safely. The return trip in? Not so successful. In case you haven't been able to tell Roger is VERY stubborn. He decided he needed to go into the house. Though our friend asked if he needed assistance or if Roger wanted him to get me, roger responded "no I got it". And he did not have it. Unfortunately he fell backwards and landed on his tailbone and hip area on oue brick courtyard Per X-rays this evening, good news is no broken bones. Bad news is excruciating pain 100 times worse than before. We are staying the night. Roger is being admitted. At least for the night possibly more. He is on an I've drip of pain mess which barely seem to be taking the edge off. It's 11:45 and I anticipate we won't see his room until 2:00am if we are lucky. Pain remains the center of Roger's world and is consuming him. As I look over at him, every few minutes his face scrunches in pain.

I had hopes of posting some old pictures from our wedding. Tomorrow (technically minutes from now) is our 16th wedding anniversary. Roger asked me this afternoon if I remember where he was when he proposed to me. I laughed and said "yes, you were flat on your back on our sofa convelesing from kidney stone blasting....hmmmmm was that writing on the wall...must mean I really love you...then and now. Wouldn't be anywhere else honey. No where else".

So that's all I got for you right now. Will update you when I have an update ....and more energy. Xoxoxo. A&R. (sorry for typos etc. working from the IPad ...and the device and I don't speak the same language).