On the eve of Week 4

What happened to predictability??? The word must vanish from the dictionary when you or someone you love has cancer. If you have cancer or someone you love has cancer, you can no longer predict how that person will feel on a daily basis. You can't predict what his/her disposition will be. You can't predict energy levels. It just seems impossible to predict anything. Maybe if you stop and think, there really isn't anything predictable about life, right? So what am I complaining about? Its just life.

After kinda fading last night, Roger decided (and I completely agreed) that he was going to "take it easy" today. No working. No pushing it. The big activity of the day was going out to a go-kart race at a local track with his friend Bill. After spending a couple hours at the track, they returned and Roger said he felt even more pooped than yesterday ...so another souped up milk-shake with extra protein powder to amp up the protein and the calories and some good ol' easy-chair time. Hopefully that will help. We have a feeling that the reason he is feeling worn-out is because his blood cells have taken a beating. Red, white, and platelets all numbers have come down. We have another appoint with the oncologist tomorrow and more blood drawn. Unfortunately we won't have the lab results for a couple days. It will be interesting to see what the counts are now. The long and the short of it is, that Roger probably needs to scale it back a little, take a nap or two during the day, and still consume as many fluids, proteins, and calories as possible. We'll see what Dr B has to say.

We continue to hear of more people with cancer - even esophageal cancer. I have two co-workers who have family members with esophageal cancer. Its so strange. We had never heard of this kind of cancer and now know of two people through my office and then more friends of friends or friends of family members. We also have learned that my aunt (my mother's youngest sister) has been diagnosed with non-hodgkin lymphoma. And then all the pancreatic What is going on?? Is there something in the water or the food? Or is this just another "fun" part of getting older? You never noticed these things when you were in your 20's or 30's and then BOOM! post 40 and you hear about it more and more.

I've included a couple extra pictures. The one at the top of the page is from yesterday when Roger was working on the door to a linen closet upstairs. The photo to the left is of Roger glass blowing. Many of you may not know that he has taken this up. He has a natural ability and makes some beautiful vases, bowls, glasses. Don't be surprised if you receive a Roger Original for xmas. He is still trying to keep up with some private classes because he enjoys it so much. I've included photos of some of his recent creations.

So that is where we are today. I think the wind has been taken out of both our sails. It feels like such a let down that the good feeling and energy couldn't just stay with Roger through the whole weekend and beyond. Hopefully its just a temporary thing.

Thanks to everyone out there for all the calls and get-well/hang-in-there cards and posts to this blog. Roger really appreciates the continued out pouring of love and support.