chemo sucks

Started chemo on Wednesday and it was a rapid decent to hell.  Roger said he felt poorly almost immediately and has been steadily going downhill since then.  He has been a trooper and has tried to eat as much as possible.  His nausea has been coupled with vomiting again.  Unfortunately we are all too familiar with the chemo drill.  Roger hasn't made much movement from the sofa except up to bed.  Beyond that, there hasn't been much activity.  I managed to get him to go for a walk around the neighborhood Friday (when the sun FINALLY came out). 

Chemo brain.  Yep, it really exists.  Roger has been SPACEEEEYYYYYY.  Very spacey.  He stares at the TV and nothing seems to register. Thursday and Friday he simply couldn't focus, couldn't respond to questions very well.  His brain seems to be back more today but its offset by the fact he feels sooooo badly.  He pretty much shuts down.  So, me and the cats hunker down and ride out the chemo storm until Roger comes back. 

His sensitivity to cold is waaaay up.  Friday, we got home from the infusion center.  I turned the heat up to 77 (holyhell!).  Roger was nestled into the sofa with pillows surrounding him in a nest.  He was wearing jeans, socks, shoes, two shirts and a sweater and STILL was cold.  I had to change out of light house pants and t-shrt into shorts and a tank top....and I STILL WAS SWEATING.  I told him there wasn't much more I could take off without the risk of terrifying the neighbors.  So, more blankets for Roger and a fan positioned in front of my chair. 
We're hoping tomorrow will be better than today.  We are still hooking Roger up to fluids at home.  Just finished the dosage for tonight.  We will infuse again tomorrow and Monday and then will pull his needle as its too uncomfortable long-term for him to sleep.  Sleep is so precious and limited that we hate to have anything impede his ability.  Nothing seems to get him completely through the nite...even the ever dreaded Ambien doesn't seem to do it. 

Roger did move our boat to the new marina last week.   It turned out to be a big trip that zapped him once he finally got home.  The wind was up which made for 4 foot waves out on the river.  I'll spare you all the details but suffice to say it was exhausting.  You don't realize how much your core works when you are on the water.  Since Roger's system has been so whacked from his surgeries and the cancer generally, he just doesn't have the stamina or energy he used to.  Layer on a lot of physical effort to get the jetski out and winterized, and the boat tied down in the new slip....just a whole lotta work.  His sister, cousin, and Roger left Louisville Sunday, went through the lock system on Monday afternoon (Dad got on the boat in Madison to go through the locks), and then tied up at the new dock late Monday afternoon.  They camped out on the boat Sunday and Monday evening.   I haven't seen the new slip yet but am familiar with the area.  It should be a good spot and a smidge closer to Indy.  We're looking forward to summer already (not too premature, right?).

Weekend has and will continue to be quiet.  I spent most of the day working.  Doesn't seem to matter how much I work....I cant get caught up.  drowning.  drowning  drowning.  I also ended up mowing the yard one last time and raked up a few piles of leaves.  Our trees seem to be stubborn this year and are holding onto their leaves.  We usually have 2-3 big leaf raking/bagging weekends.  Most of the leaves seem to be from the neighbors (damn neighbors)  :-)   Tis' the season.  I'm hoping to get Roger out tomorrow again for another walk - shuffling through the leaves seems like a perfect fall-day thing to do. 

Not much more on our end.  As I said in the title....chemo sucks.  Pretty simple.  Pretty basic...but it best describes where we are. 

go out and play in the leaves....snow will be here before we know it!   ~ a & r